I thought about confident people. I learned that no matter what mistakes I made, people understood, because they made the same mistakes. When sober at a party, you're probably thinking all the time how quiet and awkward you are, instead of actually listening to other people and interacting etc. I realized that if there WAS a self-confidence pill, I would absolutely take it. Thank you! 12 answers to question "I dont like myself when Im drunk and I dont like myself when Im sober" Sign Up Become a Coach. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. It was actually fun. How can I change myself when I only feel like myself while drunk ? The psychological path seems awkward at first, but it really works. I had a similar experience when I started drinking in my later teens.

It should not be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Anyway, turned out to be a good thing. JavaScript is disabled. So yeah back to the question, is this drink related or is it possible theres something underlying? I'm definitely saving this comment. Ok so when I drink, I often reach a point where I switch from being me (usuall happy and jolly especially after a drink) to being very serious. The first step is to recognize these self-destructive thoughts circling around in your head. I can't even type "networking events" without hearing a chord of dread and morose evil ringing in my head.

Years later, I had a job with a great salary, but part of that job was attending networking events. I apologize if my format is wrong and appreciate any advice. Fully understand what you are like when you are drunk. Ultimately you can succeed, but you may never be the life of the party-- and that's fine. The Mental Health Forum is run by Together For Change, Suite 223, 266 Banbury Road, Oxford, United Kingdom, OX2 7DL I'm introverted as well. Any advice posted on the Mental Health Forum website or forum is for support purposes only. Unless I'm drunk, then I'm the life of the party dancing and laughing and I don't know how to get that without being drunk because it's not always acceptable to be drunk even in college. I got people's names wrong (sometimes MORTIFYINGLY so - like confusing one CEO with another, similar-looking but older and uglier CEO, and they knew it, and they were PISSED). ... Oh I REALLY don't like myself when I'm hung over :-/ .. When you're all quiet and awkward you don't listen, but listen to your destructive thoughts instead. Just me, normal, sociable. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life. It's the same like you getting drunk to "solve" the problem. There is a section in the book that states that alcohol lowers a lot of our inhibitions and allows us to act/talk freely so you're not inside your head so much (I apologize for not knowing all the technical terminology). ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

There are many techniques to achieve that, and then neutralize these thoughts. But I get happy and giggly on wine, grumpy on vodka and just relaxed on rum. Sounds like me a few years ago. In fact, I even read a few books on socializing that helped me a lot.

Unless I'm drunk, then I'm the life of the party dancing and laughing and I don't know how to get that without being drunk because it's not always acceptable to be drunk even in college. I was charming and funny, because I took the pill and became that character. Act like a confident person would until you're comfortable in the situation. It just takes time to figure out who you really are. Hi there. Sounds like you have anxiety. I made jokes that were so inappropriate that I am literally cringing just thinking of them. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding. Sorry for that massive write up, pretty sure i went on a tangent too. It seriously is just faking it, you can feel like you want to run away and hide, but as long as you 'act' as though you're confident, people usually see it as confidence.

You must log in or register to reply here. I'm not sure if my issue is confidence or what, but I'm very quiet and awkward at parties. Yeah, sounds strange, but these techniques (taught in the aforementioned book and I guess in many other similar books) really do magic. Except for when I'm drunk. Drunk, I'm happy, energetic, and love life. 5 Things I tell Myself When I'm Drunk Kain Devine I, like I’m sure many people who enjoy the occasional alcoholic beverage as much as I do, have a certain list of things I tend to tell myself as I gradually make my way to bottom of that infamous “one to many”. Met some really cool people, i feel this way but worry it will consume me if i let it so i don’t drink, You might benefit from seeing a therapist my dude, figure out why you feel the way you do.

It would fix so many things! The world didn't end. But there is no pill, because it's in your head, and you have to change your thinking.". it's just my personal opinion based on my own experience with issues similar like yours). I lost like a stone.

So - I made myself a mental self-confidence "pill".

If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like join now. I feel like another person sober, suicidal, lonely, bored of life. It will help! I made a lot of mistakes. i love and hate that for you because that’s literally me. I'm fed up of this .. It’s great to see you. I don't drink any more, and had to develop my social skills naturally (using some of the techniques described in this thread), which was obviously much more difficult than just getting drunk and becoming an instant extrovert. And if something awkward happened, it happened to the character, and I could just tweak her for next time. Drunk people suck, and are unbearable to be around, Keep being the drunk guy around people and they won't stay around very long, More posts from the TrueOffMyChest community, Press J to jump to the feed. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the selfimprovement community. I'm not sure if it's just the drinking or if there is some underlying issues. The techniques make you question your own thoughts and you will make fun of your thoughts (singing them to such melody ridicules the thoughts). Here is what I would tell my younger self if I could: I know it sounds hard, but stopping to worry is the first step.

Navigate Mental Health Services in the UK. The pill analogy is fantastic, and might be just what I need. I just feel like I'm less timid, more sociable, more... normal. I have no idea why, and this is purely based on observation not any kind of science. I am a college student and I would call myself ani introvert but I do love going out and having fun with friends. It is also a subreddit to share your helpful and civil ideas, tips, and advice on how others can improve themselves. I'm not sure if my issue is confidence or what, but I'm very quiet and awkward at parties. Press J to jump to the feed. And the therapist said that the "pill" was to change my thinking. I would try new things, because I was in character, and that character liked bold new experiences. Always seek the advice of your doctor, psychiatrist or other qualified health professional with any questions you may have regarding a mental health or other medical condition. I apologize if my format is wrong and appreciate any advice. “Make the most of yourself....for that is all there is of you.” I found it really hard to speak in full sentences although i returned to normal after a break at christmas. I had some real social anxiety, and once, in therapy, my counselor laughed and said "Oh, I wish I could just give you a self-confidence pill! I read a book a couple years ago called "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking". I get you? I had to talk to everyone. Different types of alcohol seem to affect people differently. The thing with conversations is that you need to LISTEN. So I'm drunk texting here. http://www.drunkard.com/issues/03_03/03-03_zen_drinking_alone.htm. I had to make OTHERS feel comfortable (which is hilarious given how terrified I was the first few times.) If you don’t like weed, I recommend trying to capture your personality when you’re drunk.

My advice is to never see a psychiatrist for that matter, because it's a waste of time and even dangerous (they might want to put you on medications and crap. I think I have some minor social anxiety. One thing I'm glad I learned at a young age: your image of yourself being "a better version of yourself when drunk" is all in your head. Welcome! Find your drink. I'd go into work the next day, and nothing happened. I had the same issue and thought I could just use alcohol as a social crutch. Copyright 2007 - 2020 Together 4 Change Limited - A non-profit organisation.

To be drunk and in love in New York City Midnight into morning coffee Burning through the hours talking Damn I like me better when I'm with you I like me better when I'm with you I knew from the first time, I'd stay for a long time 'Cause I like me better when I like me better when I'm with you I don't know what it is but I got that feeling I fully understand where you are coming from about the topic. And it was my company hosting the events, so I had to be ON. Idk this is a weird thing for me, the fact that I'm expressing my feelings is alien enough it makes me feel weird, but since I'm drunk the weirdness is not there. Self-confident character me realized that other people were shy and awkward too, so I would start the conversation to HELP them, because I was the one with the confidence and they were not. So- I would envision myself mentally swallowing a self-confidence pill, and for that day, I was pretending to be a character, a self-confident character. And I was able to calibrate, and go to the next event with better skills. I used to self harm like 3/4 years ago but havent … This book really helped me, but you could also see a psychologist. I started uni sept of 2012 and as my old flatmate put it "went a but weird" month or so after starting. Except for when I'm drunk. Sorry if this is shitty advice! I often hit things. And yet, with every experience - I learned. I just feel like I'm less timid, more sociable, more... normal. But I've realized from a while ago that I just don't like myself.

Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. So practice often! Think about alcohol as a cold glass of extroversion. Taking medication to solve all your problems sounds convincing but doesn't solve your problem.